I didn’t want to make this post if I was being honest. I’m someone who likes to keep my private life private. I hate talking about really personal things because it leave room for judgement. I decided to share anyways because I know I’m not the only one going through it and people need to hear that it’s okay to be sad.
I am heartbroken and it’s okay. It’s so bad that I’ve lost motivation to do anything. I feel like there’s this stigma after a break up that you have to put yourself together and become this boss ass bitch that doesn’t need no man. I’m here to say that you don’t have to always be okay. It is perfectly normal to feel like your world has fallen apart.
It’s really hard to be in a place where you’re fine and doing okay. I have all my friends always telling me I deserved better and that I’m too good for him but I don’t feel it. I actually don’t want to believe it. I don’t want better I had the best and I am not too good, I was just right.
I even feel stupid sometimes. I miss him dearly and what if he doesn’t miss me at all? (No contact rule is in motion) I don’t want to be that person that misses someone that doesn’t miss you. It’s like my worst fear.
All I can says is that breaking up is hard and you don’t have to be this fierce person expects you to be. I tried, I bought myself a Macbook with the vacation money I was saving for our vacation together and I cut my hair extremely short. It’s all fierce things but it doesn’t make you feel better permanently.